So I saw my very new pregnant sister on the weekend. It is still really awkward with her at the moment. We are civil to each other but we both still don't make an effort to make converstions.
I can't bring myself to make polite conversation with her about her pregnancy or even look at her. At this stage I'm still numb & still trying to deal with my emotions. I don't feel comfortable in asking her things such
"Oh how are you feeling?"
"Have you had any morning sickness?"
"When are you due?". (I know in August sometime but not sure what date).
... I know this IF thing is shit & if I wasn't dealing with this, I know I would be feel different but I can't help the way I feel at the moment. Maybe it selfish but it's helping me survive.
But the funny thing is. (Well I & Mr W think it's funny). She is only 7 weeks pregnant but she looks & is acting like she is 4 months. Honestly I'm not making it up, if anyone saw her they would automatically think she was 4 months pregnant. But the truth is she is just FAT & she was exactly the same before she fell pregnant. But now she is wearing her fat belly as a badge of honour and acting like the entire thing is a pregancy belly, which isn't the case.
I know it may be mean or cruel, as I'm aware that people so start to show at different times, but this is my own insecurities & frustrating showing..
I long to be the fat one too...